TOY TRIVIA

Bet you didn't know this:

LEGO originally got its name from founder Ole Kirk Christiansen by combining the Danish words "Leg Got" that means "play well" and later realized that the word LEGO in Latin translates to "I put together."

or this:

On July 5, 2009, Toys R Us opened a store in Kuwait.

or that:

The first Radio Flyer wagon was the "No. 4 Liberty Coaster", which was built from wood and steel in 1923.

Also....

In 2003, the National Toy Hall of Fame at the Strong Museum inducted ABC blocks into their collection, granting it the title of one of America's toys of "national significance."

Plus....

The Etch A Sketch toy was invented in France in the late 1950s by André Cassagnes, in his basement. He called it "L'Ecran Magique", the magic screen. In 1959, he took his drawing toy to the International Toy Fair in Nuremburg, Germany. The Ohio Art Company saw it but had no interest in the toy. When Ohio Art saw the toy a second time, they decided to take a chance on the product. The L'Ecran Magique was soon renamed the Etch A Sketch and became the most popular drawing toy in the business.

Additionally:


Frisbees originated at various New England colleges when students began throwing empty pie tins from the Frisbee Baking Company of Bridgeport, Connecticut.


And finally:


A husband and wife created the game of Yahtzee while on their yacht, thus the name "Yahtzee."

Oh wait, here's one more:

In 1989, Lonnie Johnson was trying to build a better refrigerator, based on a low-cost heat pump that circulated water instead of Freon. But when one of his custom-machined brass nozzles blasted a stream of water across his bathroom, Johnson—by day an engineer at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory—realized he had the makings of something way more fun. A shotgun-style air pump and a series of check valves allowed for sniperlike range and accuracy with little exertion. Selling the idea to toy companies, though, was more of an effort. After seven years of frustration, Johnson scrapped his difficult-to-manufacture

Plexiglas “pressure containment vessel” for an empty 2-liter soda bottle. It wasn’t slick, but it was easy to make. In 1990, the toy maker Larami brought the Power Drencher to store shelves; it sold roughly 2 million of them in the first year alone. Rebranded as the Super Soaker, the line has raked in sales of more than $200 million to date.

Click on this link to see a prototype of the Super Soaker:

http://www.wired.com/magazine/2010/08/ff_prototypes/

Does knowing a little something about the toys you are buying, make the "buying" process less painful?  I hope so.  Merry Christmas!

Showing Mercy

O give thanks unto the God of heaven: for his mercy endureth for ever.  Psalms 136:26

Thankfully, our heavenly Father certainly doesn't give us what we deserve.  We are shown mercy upon mercy.  We are amazed at the endless supply of grace and mercy given us by the Lord Jesus Christ.    The definition of grace is receiving favor that is undeserved.  Many times grace and kindness are used interchangeably, but really grace is showing or receiving kindness, when the kindness is not deserved.  I don't in any way deserve God's favor, salvation, and eternal home, and yet God saw fit to give me all of these things.  I do deserve punishment and eternal separation from God in hell, and yet God saw fit to spare me these things.  This is mercy.

Our children benefit from our grace and mercy.  What a sad and cumbersome life for the child that is never shown either.  For your benefit, here are some times in which I will show grace and/or mercy to my children.  You are welcome to provide examples of your own in the comments.

Sometimes children just do silly, dumb, or crazy things.  There are times when they just can't help themselves.  (Yes, I said it.)  They are careless and spill things.  They get excited and are very loud.  They see the bubble wrap or streamers or confetti and no adult around.  Unless you have given specific instructions, gather all the patience you can muster, take a deep breath, and you and your child clean up the mess, fix the broken lamp, etc. etc.  You cannot tolerate willful disobedience, but you can tolerate kids being kids.  I know there is a fine line between the two; pray for wisdom and use your best judgment as you decide if the line has been crossed.

I don't back my kids into a corner (figuratively speaking) so that they feel compelled to lie to me.  For example, if I see one of my kids take a cookie, or do something wrong I will not ask the him if he committed the offense.  I will not ask my 6 year old, "Did you hit her?"  Instead I say, "I saw you hit her."  If I already know the offense has been committed, there is no reason to give my child an opportunity to lie.  There will be times when I genuinely don't know whether or not my child has done something wrong and I will have to ask them to tell the truth and admit their offense.  At that time, a lie will be dealt with seriously.

When my kids have done something wrong, but tell me the truth about it, I show mercy.  They may not get off scott free, but I honor their truthfulness.  I will show mercy and emphasize how important it is to always tell the truth.

Finally, if my child is very contrite I will sometimes (not often) grant a free pass.  They know they deserve punishment and yet they will be shown mercy.  We all mess up, and I think it is important for our children to be shown mercy as they grow up.  What a great opportunity to minister to our children, as we speak about the gospel, and the mercy the Lord has shown to us.

Are there times when your child gets a "get out of jail" card?  Comment, I'd love to hear your examples!

Cast Out the Bondwoman and her Son

I would like to share with you a message my dad shared with our church a few weeks ago.  I am not quoting him word for word.  I took what I heard and then applied it to my own life, and will try to do it justice here.

"Nevertheless what saith the scripture? Cast out the bondwoman and her son: for the son of the slave woman shall not be heir with the son of the freewoman."  Galatians 4:30

In the fourth chapter of Galatians, Paul gives us a wonderful analogy of law and grace from the Old Testament.  When Abraham was in his late seventies, and his wife Sarah in her sixties, God promised made a promise to Abraham.  God promised Abraham a son.  This son would be a miracle because Sarah was beyond child bearing years.  God promises Abraham that through this son, his descendants would be more numerous than the stars of heaven (Gen. 26:4). 

How wonderful Abraham must have felt, knowing that we would not die childless, and that God would use his seed to birth a nation.  However, several years go by, and there is no son.  So, Sarah decides she is going to "help things along."  As a result, Abraham and Sara's handmaid Hagar give birth to Ishmael.  There was nothing miraculous about Ismael's birth.  Ishmael was born as a result of human effort, not as a result of God's promise.   God does deliver a son to Abraham and Sarah, several years later, much to their surprise.  Sarah names her son Isaac, which means laughter, because the first thing Sarah did when she found out she was going to bear a son was laugh.   Ishmael is loved by Abraham just as much as Isaac even though Ishmael was not the son of promise.  Ishmael is 13 (Genesis 17:25) years old when Isaac is born.  When it is time for Isaac to be weaned, Abraham and Sarah decide to give a feast.  It is during the preparation of the feast when we read in Genesis that Ishmael mocks Isaac.  Sarah, hearing Ishmael mock her son, tells Abraham, "Cast out the bondwoman and her son."  Sarah knows she cannot have Ishmael in the picture; she understands that Isaac is the true son of promise.  Now Abraham, who no doubt loves Ishmael just as much as Isaac, must send him and his mother away.  Ishmael can have nothing to do with Isaac.  What hard ache Abraham must have felt, to have to do this to his son. 

Paul uses this Old Testament account to illustrate to the believers in Galatia the difference between human effort and promise, between slavery and freedom, between the Old Covenant and the New Covenant, between law and grace.  Law and grace cannot be together, because the law will always condemn.  The child of "law" is self righteousness.  Self-righteousness is: God, you can have most of the glory, but I'll take just a little bit.  God is not going to share his glory, he gets it all.  Our default setting is to rely on ourselves in our Christian life, in our jobs as the nurturers of our children and in the education of our children.  However, when we "lay our head down on our pillows at night" to quote from my dad, we know that the Lord is working all things for our good.  We know that old system of works is not for the Christian.  The Lord has done it all, and now we get to enjoy the blessings of our dear Savior.  We get to participate in good works that the Lord has ordained for us to do (Eph. 2:10). 

I may sound like I am against law, or that I feel like I can just sit back and "wait" for God to raise my kids for me.  I don't mean this at all.  I work hard every day, being the kind of mother and Christian the Bible instructs me to be.  However, I do not live my Christian life with a performance mentality because I know my "righteousness" is in Christ.  Again, this does not make me lawless.  I am accountable for my actions, and I will reap what I sow.  If I choose to be a poor mother, my kids will be negatively affected.   The only reason I am not a poor mother, however, is because of the grace of God.  God has given me new birth, he has transferred me "from the kingdom of darkness into the kingdom of his dear Son" (Col. 1:13).  He has given me the Holy Spirit, a love for His word, and a desire to raise my children to know and love Him.  So, I take great comfort despite my failures as a mother.  I know that God is sovereign.  I know He will bring to pass all that he desires.  I know he is working in me to "will and to do of his good pleasure" (Phil. 2:13).   And I know that my own worry about the job I'm doing as a wife and mother is self righteousness.  It is Ishmael peaking his head around the corner, mocking the freedom and grace I have in the Lord Jesus Christ.

 I would like to think this might encouraging you, as you are raising your children, some of you homeschooling them, as I do.  Your kids aren't going to always behave the way you want them to.  You are not always going to behave as you want to.  You don't always say the right words to your children, I certainly don't say what I should say to mine.  You will not always have the correct attitudes towards your children, I don't towards mine.  However, I have found after years of exposure to my dad's teaching, that the more I hear about the grace of God, the more I want to do the will of God.  Understand grace.  Know who you are as a Christian.  Know that the old system of law, of performance is over.  There is a new covenant and it is 100 times better than the old.  It is the only way to be a child of God.  Know that your efforts are not what saved you, and are they are not what keep you.   It is the faithfulness of God that keeps you, it is the grace of God that sustains us all.

OBEDIENCE: THE ONLY LOGICAL CHOICE

We all want our kids to obey.  We want it to be easy for them to obey.  Sometimes we can say certain things or do certain things to make obedience difficult for our children.  Make your home, your words, your actions, everything send a message to your children that the easiest and most advantageous action is obedience.  Make disobedience such a nasty affair, that your children give up on it.  I know that sometimes there is willful disobedience in our children.  The willful disobedience comes when your child has flat decided he is not going to obey.  You can do everything right and still elicit willful disobedience from your children.  You have to deal with that, it comes with the territory.  However, sometimes our children disobey because we haven't made it easy for them to obey.  Unwittingly, we can make obedience an uphill battle, instead of the choice that makes the most sense.  When I'm searching out information about a given topic, I like to find the information in a list format.  For example, "Ten Easy Steps to avoid eating Chocolate Pie" or "Five Things to say instead of ( you can fill in the blank ....)."   So here are two lists to make obedience easy for your kids.

DO THESE FIVE THINGS:

1. Expect obedience.  Simple, but if you can get this one down, follow the rest of my advice or not, chances are your kids will obey you.

2.  Be consistent!  The rules are the same and consequences always follow act of disobedience.

3. Watch what you say and how you say it.  Be clear in your instructions, so your children have no excuse to disobey.

4. Establish good habits in your children.


5. Praise your children when they obey.  A few carefully chosen words of commendation can go a long way when raising kids to respect you, and to fear God.

DON'T DO THESE FIVE THINGS :

1. Employ guilt or sarcasm in order to elicit obedience.  Guilt doesn't work because children are immune to it (maybe they give them a shot at the hospital or something) and sarcasm doesn't work because children don't understand it.

2. Set unreasonable expectations.  For example, if your child is only 3, don't say, "Go clean your room."  Instead, go with him in his room, and say, "Put all of your dirty clothes in this basket.  Pick up these papers and put them in this folder.  Put all of your legos in this bucket."  It's more work, but the room will get clean, by your child, not by you at a later date when you just can't take it anymore.

3.  Count.  Please don't count.  Instructions should be given with the expectation they will be obeyed.  Your child doesn't need a "consideration" period.  This is what your child hears when you count:
1 -  Your disobedience is acceptable to me.
2 -  I'm  irritated, but your disobedience is still acceptable to me.
2 and 1/2 - Now I'm very angry, but your disobedience is still acceptable to me.
3 - Now your disobedience is UNACCEPTABLE.

4.  Make excuses for your child's disobedience because someday, even to you, the excuses will wear thin.

5. Pontificate.  Don't give your children, especially young ones, long pontifications about the reasons behind your rules.  You are only inviting an argument. 

Now go give your kids a hug and resolve to make obedience their only logical choice!

Stuart Smalley Revisited

This blog is one that I have previously written, but was posted on a my own website that I am no longer using.  My apologies if you have already read this one.  For those of you who haven't......

Do you remember the Stuart Smalley character on Saturday Night Live a number of years ago?  He was a motivational speaker/self help guru that ended his words of wisdom each week with a look in a mirror and the mantra:  I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and gosh darn it, people like me!  Well Mr. Smalley, I have my own mommy mantra, and it goes a little something like this: I’m good enough for my child, I’m smart enough for my child, and gosh darn it, my child doesn’t always have to like me! 

1.  I’m good enough for my child.  I truly believe mothers, especially those raising young children, should here this every hour of every day.  Those precious little ones you are trying so hard to raise in the “fear and admonition of the Lord” were given to you by the Lord himself.  You are the best parent for your child, not your neighbor, your best friend, or your well meaning relative that seems to have child rearing all figured out.  As a child of God yourself, you have the big picture in mind.  The love you have for your child encompasses more wisdom, knowledge, and godliness, than the love your child has for you, at least now.  You have the Bible as the guide that steers you in your course.  The only guide your child has most often is his own happiness.   So take heart in the fact that your child is in good hands; yours!

2.  I’m smart enough for my child.  Did you know that 99% of the time, you will make better choices than your child?  While our children are equal in worth, they are not equal in the “wisdom” department.  This may be fairly obvious, but when tensions are high, or the tantrums are many and we let our emotions take over, there is a tendency to forget just how foolish children are.  I’m not trying to denigrate your children; I’m simply presenting a realistic picture of them.  One of the great tasks you face as a mother is to bring your child from the known, to the unknown.  What are those concepts your child knows?  He knows instant gratification.  He knows self.  He knows “what’s in it for me?”  In contrast, what are those concepts that your child does not know?  Self-sacrifice, empathy, serving others, and delayed gratification just to name a few.   Don’t negotiate with your child in order to bring about compliance.  He doesn’t bring anything good to the negotiating table.  Evaluate your policies, and make changes as you see fit.  Just be careful that you do not let your child, through clever arguments or horrendous tantrums, alter your expectations.  You set the bar, not your child.

3.  Gosh darn it, my child doesn’t always have to like me!  If you heed my advice above, your child will sometimes not like you.  That is OK.  If fact, children who live in the land of overindulgence are at great risk to fail as adults.  No matter how hard you try, you cannot possibly keep your child happy 24/7.  First of all, children have some pretty lofty and complicated ideas about what makes them happy.  Second, sometimes, through no fault of their own, no is just the best answer.  The sooner they understand this very important reality of life, the better off they are going to be.  Avoid the habit of trying to “soften the blow” of no too often.  Don’t feel like if he can’t have the $50 box of  Legos you need to give him a consolation prize.  Of course every now and then or even sometimes it’s fine to say no, and then offer something else.  However, if your child expects to be offered a “plan B” every time he cannot have want he wants, you have set a dangerous precedent.  Don’t forget, the older children get, the more expensive his desires become!   Don’t take it personally when your child wails and laments his “unfair” treatment or hurls baseless accusations your way.  Take this behavior for what it really is; pure rebellion and unwillingness to submit to your authority.  Put an end to the nonsense by handing out a severe and memorable consequence, instead of compromising or placating.  The wailing and accusations will be sure to return if that is your course of action.

If you have been reading my blogs, and are concerned for my own children (because my advice seems strict or harsh), I can assure you, your fears are totally unwarranted.  I let my children out of the closet most days, and on rare occasions let them intermingle with other mortals.  My children would sing my praises until the cows come home, if I would let them speak.

An Educational Philosophy

Over the years, I have heard so many stories about public schools.  I have heard anecdote after anecdote from various friends, or friends of friends concerning their experiences with the public school system.   I have 12 years of my own public/private school experience in which to reflect as well.  Every story I hear or memory I recall makes me so thankful I can homeschool my own children.  I've not heard a story yet that makes me wonder if my kids are missing out by being home with me.  I think this is remarkable.  Over the last 6 years, I've not heard one account in which private or public education comes out a winner.  I know there are good teachers, and I know there are good schools.  However those teachers are good in spite of the public education system, not because of it, and those schools are the exception, rather than the rule.  I can say this despite only having first hand knowledge of one or two public schools.  I don't need to know each particular school in depth, because it is the educational philosophy behind public education that is the problem, not the individual schools themselves.  My public school diatribe cannot end without an educational philosophy of my own.  So, here it is:

I teach my children to obey, for without obedience they will grow up fools.

I teach my children about the cross of Christ, for without the cross they are lost.

I teach my children about the grace of God, for without grace their guilty consciences have no hope.

I teach my children the 3 Rs, for without them they will grow up ignoramuses.

I teach my children discernment, for without discernment turmoil will follow them.

I teach my children to be kind to others, for a life lived without kindness is a life of death.

I allow my children to pursue what interests them; standing in their way would be unthinkable.

Hey Kid, Before You Eat that Ice Cream Cone, Read the Fine Print!

Do frozen treats come with hidden fees at your house?   Sometimes we as mothers like to give our kids the extras.  An extra bag of popcorn offered here, another 10 minutes at the park granted there...and sometimes we just go completely nuts and make an entire day of special fun for our kids.  I think this is a good thing.  We all could use a little pampering, and our young ones are no exception.  However, all of those extras you offer should not, and do not entitle you to better behavior on the part of your children.  Don’t act like you don’t know exactly what I’m talking about.  You spend a day taking your children to every delightful place they love, giving them every indulgence they ask for, that ought to be good for a least a few “yes, moms” instead of more “no ways!”, right?  Not so fast.  First of all, it’s a little sneaky to load them up with goodies and take them on adventures without at least explaining there are added expectations on their part.  You may not think you are being sneaky or unreasonable as you pile on the extra favors, but the minute you feel even slightly resentful at the first sign of disobedience you need to take a step back and evaluate the situation.  Ask yourself, if I hadn’t just taken Johnny swimming, and then to Braums for ice cream, would I be as angry at him for the whack he just took at his sister?  Secondly, for heaven’s sake, if you are going to be a smooth operator and get good behavior in exchange for these fun-fests, at least get the good behavior out of your children FIRST.  We are talking about little kids here.  Finally, and perhaps most importantly, your children need to obey you because they know very bad things will happen to them if they don’t.  They should obey you because they have a healthy respect for you and because you have consistently shown them that you follow through with consequences (more on that in the next blog) when they don’t obey.  Years ago I heard a very frustrated mother in Barnes and Noble tell her kids, “I’ve taken you to place X and we’ve seen marvel Y, and now we are here getting books and you won’t behave!”   I wonder if her kids knew that the morning’s events were going to come back and bite them.  Guilt trips seldom work on young children; believe me, I’ve tried.

Why Ask Why?

We have all had moments of complete bafflement (is that even a word?) at our children’s shenanigans.   I remember years ago we stopped in at Grandma’s house, and the first thing my children did was to go in the bathroom, get in the bathtub, pull the shower curtain closed, and stomp around like a couple of elephants.  Upon hearing the commotion from my mom’s kitchen, I ran into the bathroom, and promptly put an end to those shenanigans.  One question came to my mind and later my lips after my 2 little elephants had been removed from the bathroom: WHY?  Why did they do such a thing????  What on earth provoked them to treat my mother’s bathroom as their proverbial stomping grounds?

Isn’t this a question we often ask our kids?  WHY?  WHY did you hit your sister?  WHY did you think that the chocolate sprinkles would be the perfect addition to the already seasoned raw shrimp in the colander, just waiting to be placed in a hot, well oiled skillet? 

Well, I think I have one answer to all of those questions.  If you are thinking, “Because my children are aliens sent to earth to drain me of all mental acumen and energy!” then you are wrong.  Sorry….The correct answer is because your children are impulsive, and don't always think of the consequences of their actions.  So when you witness the dumb things they do, or will do (those of you who haven’t had a WHY or WHAT ON EARTH WERE YOU THINKING moment, don’t worry, you will) save you and your child a little time.  Don’t ask them why they are acting in a foolish manner.  Instead, tell them they are acting in a foolish manner, or a selfish manner, if that is more applicable.  When your best dinner plate is being used as a Frisbee, first of course confiscate the Frisbee, and then say something like, “A dinner plate is not to be used as a Frisbee.  You weren’t thinking about what would happen to that plate if it would have fallen.”  Then use this opportunity to talk to your child about what the word “impulsive” means.   Instead of asking little Tommy why he hit his sister, tell little Tommy the reason he hit his sister was because he was angry with her, and when he gets angry, he does things he shouldn’t do.

I think it is good to ask older children why they have behaved inappropriately.  However, I would use the question as a starting point, to guide that child to an understanding of his own impulsiveness, selfishness, etc.  In other words, ask a series of questions that leads him to the realization that he, and no one else, is to blame for the behavior.  There are always superficial reasons our children give, as to why they do things.  However, with a few prodding questions, their motivations come to the surface.  I will say this is true of adults who behave badly as well.  I often want to give excuses for my poor behavior; however, at the end of the day, I know it is my own selfishness that causes me to behave in an unkind or inappropriate way.

Finally, asking a young child why he has done something, when you really already know the answer, is not going to get the problem resolved any faster.  Your child is not going to give you a good answer anyway.  He will not say, “I flushed Katie’s Barbie head down the toilet because, first of all I am impulsive and incredibly curious, and second of all, I wanted to see Katie cry because I am selfish and have trouble empathizing with my sister.”  9 times out of 10, if you are really honest with yourself, you KNOW why Johnny flushed the Barbie head.  You only ask WHY, as I did of my own children when I came upon the stomping elephant bathroom scene, because you are frustrated, exasperated, and only able to utter one syllable.  

There are many times throughout the day to ask your children questions that begin with why.  To get their little nogans thinking, ask, “Why do you think we should wear our jackets outside?”  “Why do you need a bath?” is a perfectly wonderful question to ask a precocious 4 year old.  “Why are the leaves falling off of the trees?” would be another great question, and you get points for exposing your child to some science concepts at an early age.  Gotta love that.  As for me, the question of my day is: Faithann, why did you eat a pint of icecream at 2 am?  Because I’m a tad impulsive, perhaps?